This past weekend was bookended by the very best and the very worst of humanity. It feels like all I have done this year is mourn. From 10 January (the day I lost my beloved Starman) through to today there has been a steady flow of tears… as I type this I am listening to Anderson Cooper list the names of those beautiful SOULS who lost their lives at Pulse nightclub, as his voice falters my tears have blinded me… I can’t. I’m just so tired of my heart breaking over and over and over again.
The vicious senseless act that transpired in the early hours of Sunday morning in Orlando has fuelled me with anger, remorse and deep deep sorrow. I have been a champion of the LGBT community for over thirty years (part and parcel being a Madonna lover). I have many friends in this community so I have always known the bigotry actually lets just call it what it is – HATE – I have always known the hate that has been endured. There have been times in my life when I have struggled and it was this community that helped me find my way so I will love, honour and protect this community till the day I die.
The US has a gun problem. The rest of the world sees it. Most Americans see it. But there are others NRA hardliners and extreme right wingers who don’t seem to and yet they hold the lives of their entire nation in their hands. I thought for sure after Sandy Hook there would be real change. The correct reaction to children being massacred would surely be to ensure it never happened again but no it wasn’t to be and mass shootings have increased in the time since. As someone who comes from New Zealand and who has lived in Australia it is hard to understand why the US cannot adopt some kind of variation of these countries’ gun control legislation; legislation that both countries amended back in the nineties when they each experienced a similar type of senseless act. Some twenty years later both countries are proof that robust gun control legislation works.
And yet, yes the US has a gun problem.
But the planet has a HATE problem.
And where there is hate, violence can always find a way. Guns or no Guns.
And we can put this atrocity under the umbrella of religion, terrorism, radicalisation but there is only one actual reason it happened – Bad Parenting.
Too many people think their job as a parent is done if they feed, clothe and school their children; but giving them the confidence to be themselves, teaching and showing children generosity and kindness and how to communicate effectively, to love, respect and tolerate ALL life regardless of race, creed, gender, shape, who one chooses to love – inclusive of all creatures and mother earth – this is good parenting. I am a child of Indian descent, I know the specific homophobia that exists for people of the diaspora, it is a hostility that is deeply rooted in the culture. I have friends who still today cannot be honest about who they are to their families. This will not change until we attack the root cause.
Hatred of any kind is a choice.
A child is taught to love.
A child is taught to hate.
The seed is planted at a young age.
If one lacks the appropriate parenting and does not know their own mind, lacks confidence, is disillusioned they are open to being brainwashed by religion, terrorism, radicalisation whatever you want to call it, and as this seed gets watered regularly it grows and the reality is you reap what you sow. Hate crimes will not stop until we grow a different seed.
As mentioned at the beginning of this post, this weekend for me began with seeing the very best of humanity – Muhammad Ali’s interfaith memorial. This colossus of a man wished for his passing – as he had his life – to be a teaching moment. If you saw the service you will understand how magnificently he achieved this, if you haven’t I beseech you to watch it, listen to the words and let the sentiment wash all over you for this is how you plant a different seed.
To my brothers and sisters of the LGBT community you forever have my heart; to steal words said so eloquently on Sunday by Lin-Manuel Miranda “Love is love is love is love is love is love is love is love. Cannot be killed or swept aside.” And nor shall it be.
Sat Nam
Also… Muhammad Ali – what a gift of a man – the one person on this planet who transcended race, religion, gender to unite all in their love and respect for him. There is no one left who comes close to achieving this. On a personal note, I owe him gratitude for because of him and his wondrous life I achieved my highest mark in all my academia when in college I did a History paper on his civil rights contribution. It was a joy to research him. It was a joy to listen to him riff. It was a joy to watch him in and out of the ring. Muhammad Ali – a masterclass in what it means to be human and so pretty too. To have lived in your time, how lucky am I #IamAli #G.O.A.T. #AliBomaye ♥ And so the BREXIT campaign enters into the last week, it’s been a minefield figuring out the right way to vote – you only have to look at Greece and Portugal to see that austerity has not worked and that the EU has completely failed to deal with the refugee reception crisis yet being in the EU is like being a part of a cosmopolitan club with trade, employment and travel benefits #ShouldBritainStayOrShouldBritainGo ♥ And my girl Hills – Whop Whop the FIRST WOMAN to be a major party’s nominee for President of the United States. Proving there is no ceiling too high to break. Next stop 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue #I’mWithHer #Hillary2016
A Charmed Life 
15 June, 2016 at 12:00
You speak my exact words re the parenting.. if I could be granted two wishes one would be that we can’t be parents until our own childhood has been checked. All these idiots who are messing up the world do not have love in their lives.. just dictatorship. It also makes me so angry these narrow minded f’wits who do not accept all individuals.
15 June, 2016 at 13:53
Yip!!! The places we live in. (not the physical one’s)
15 June, 2016 at 14:01
Very right you are. It Is what’s undid out hearts that man is who we are
16 June, 2016 at 23:56
I don’t know you, but you are wonderful. 🙂
17 June, 2016 at 06:42
awww bless what a lovely thing to say.
I just read some of your work – I like your style x
17 June, 2016 at 13:08
Wow, really deep, but true, especially parenting, sometimes, we do take things for granted, and hope that our children, will grow to be good but now we as parents, need to install all the good in them and hope for the best. Talk to them and continuously remind them to love instead of hate, and never discriminate.
Love reading your posts,
18 June, 2016 at 13:16
Excellent write-up 🙂 you are very skilled blogger, Keep it up 😉 awaiting your next post …
25 June, 2016 at 06:46
Mandela and Ali are my two heroes of the twentieth century.
Parenting – We have, as a race, got to develop and mature, so we learn to value everyone and treat people with compassion and humanity. Far too many people are selfish and out for whatever they can get
25 June, 2016 at 06:53
I agree my friend everyone needs to get passed their egos and think about their fellow man/the planet 💗
3 July, 2016 at 13:20
You are right. In the end, we all will turn inward and heal our inner darkness.
This will lead humanity back into oneness and peace. Thank Heavens!
Beautiful words and sentiments. Peace be with you.
3 July, 2016 at 13:25
And also with you 🙏🏼
7 July, 2016 at 15:25
Your writing penetrates. Thank you. Yes, America has a gun problem and it is perpetuated by a very powerful, wealthy NRA. But, as you noted the root is in upbringing AND WHAT WE HAVE ACCEPTED AS ENTERTAINMENT. Guns, violence, blood and sex on TV and at the movies. Pray for our 2016 election. It is pivotal. Peace
7 July, 2016 at 15:26
🙏🏼💗
19 July, 2016 at 11:16
Rightly said …check your homes and the society will be taken care off. Wish every parent realise this.
19 July, 2016 at 11:21
I know, its a tall order but its the way forward the equilibrium of the planet has shifted massively.
We have to raise good kind decent people 💗🙏🏼
13 December, 2016 at 13:09
Beautiful and compelling. I am fighting the same fight as you, through love. I used to be a musician/singer/songwriter and fought that way… Now I am writing 2 books. We all have a unique way to love the world, through our unique eyes.
Please continue the good work.
Eli